What goes through your mind when you meet someone new?
According to this article, and my guru Maya Angelou, there are four questions we ask ourselves about each other on a subconscious level all the time:
1 Do you see me?
2 Do you care that I’m here?
3 Am I enough for you, or do you need me to be better in some way?
4 Can I tell that I’m special to you by the way that you look at me?
According to these questions we are, on a very subtle but subconscious level, monitoring and measuring our responses to each other (and theirs to us) by seeing whether or not we fit in. Whether or not we are good enough. It makes sense, right?
But the problem is, it’s exhausting. If these are the thoughts running through our minds during every interaction, it’s no wonder we feel like closing the door at the end of the day and shutting the world out.
Here’s something you you can try:
Create a mantra that reminds you every day of how beautiful you are and what you bring to the party of life. It might be “I am enough”, “I have a right to be heard”, or “ I deserve to be loved”. Find a phrase that works for you then leave yourself these reminders everywhere.
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Copyright Delphi Ellis